Rhinoceros Party update on 2012 Platform2012-04-03
Albertans have been asking what our platform is. You know our slogan: “Privatize ALL the things.”
To adapt to our province a quote from Mark Ames:
Everyone–from the Alberta Party on the far-left, to
the Wildrose Party on the freedom-loving right – everyone who’s part of the conversation agrees that there’s no way we can avoid privatizing everything in Alberta. I’m talking about privatizing sidewalks, and putting toll booths on the sidewalks every three feet. I’m talking privatizing the mosquitoes and selling the human blood they draw to Cerberus, the whole works! So let’s not even talk about not privatizing unless we’re going to put on our tin foil hats and babble about ‘little green men” too, okay?
The idea is this: privatize the entire province, turn it into a corporation, make each and every one of us into shareholders rather than citizens, and then do an IPO for Alberta, inc. Sounds crazy? Welp, it is–completely bat-feces crazy. Which is exactly why it just might work.
This man is a genius! Expect our full platform to be released any day now.
For an appetizer, here is a major promise in our platform:
We will issue checks to every Albertan from the resource revenue. We’ll be able to do this since everything will be privatized. Everyone wins!